Unfortunately, what you do with your hands can be one of the quickest non-verbal ways to destroy the attraction that a woman feels for you, because the wrong hand movements can communicate that you are a low-status, beta male.

To make matters worse, your hands can be particularly tough to manage because, let's face it, when you feel nervous, the hardest thing in the world is figuring out what to do with your hands!

For success with your dating and seduction of women, make sure you don't make the following body language mistakes with your hands.

MISTAKE ONE. Displaying your anxiety with your hands.

You do this when you:

1. Shred napkins.
2. Make your hands into fists.
3. Sit on your hands.
4. Hold something and play with it.
5. Twiddle your fingers or thumbs.
6. Hold your hands unnaturally still.
7. Sit on your hands to avoid having the woman see them tremble.

Although you might be feeling nervous, the last thing you want to do is to let the woman detect you feel that way.

Instead you want to convey that you're calm and in control. Nothing attracts a woman more than a man who's laid back and confident.

MISTAKE TWO. Putting your fingers into your mouth.

When you bite your nails or otherwise chew on your fingers, you are, according to psychologists, doing the same thing that infants are doing when they suck their mother's breast.

For a baby, breast feeding provides comfort. When we became toddlers, our thumbs replaced our mom's nipple.

And then as adults, biting our thumbnail does the same thing. Ever noticed that when you're out in public, you mainly bite your nails when you're under pressure?

THE SOLUTION. Just hold your hands relaxed on the table.

Rest your forearms on the table, keeping your arms open and letting them drop forward.

Keep your hands and arms open and relaxed. Most of the time this means having them about 18 inches or half a meter apart, your palms facing each other, with fingers curved slightly upward.

As your palms face each other, they should also face the woman. Open palms convey honesty and being completely comfortable with yourself. Having the back of your hands facing her can often convey that you're hiding something.

Demonstrating your confidence can be as easy as that! Stop twiddling your thumbs and watch the women flock to you.

John Alexander is author of How to Become an Alpha Male, a dating and seduction success guide for men which will improve your body language and confidence.

John Alexander
Author, "How to Become an Alpha Male"
©2005

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