One may imagine that a couple will be more united when they have their first baby, but the truth is that their relationship changes a lot with the existence of a child, especially if they are young.

A baby requires constant attention and care. A young mother without any experience becomes very tired with her new obligations, besides experiencing post-partum depression because she has to care more for raising her child than living her life the way she desires.

A young father feels alone when his wife is always with the baby and the connection that exists between them is stronger than the relationship he has with her. The mother feeds the baby, has him constantly in her arms, and is more responsible for the child than anyone else. She knows how to hold the baby, even if she has no experience, because her maternal instincts start working, and the father is not as completely connected with the new child like his wife when the baby is still very young.

The beginning is very difficult for both.

Then, they have the constant problem of having to leave the baby with someone when they want to go somewhere together, or bring the baby with them, which is quite problematic in many circumstances.

The baby is a very big problem in their lives, besides being a very big joy. There are many romantic moments when their child unites them, without a doubt, but their daily lives change too much with his existence, and the problematic situations provoked by him predominate.

Of course, there are many exceptions to this rule, but in general terms, when a new child is born the young couple passes through a challenging period of time that separates them, instead of uniting them more.

Many men feel tempted to have relationships with other women, sad because they cannot have constant sexual relationships with their partner now that she is a mother, besides feeling somehow isolated while she is near the baby, who is still like a part of her own body and needs her very much.

A father doesn't feel that his child belongs to them, even if the baby has inherited his facial features, because the child seems to belong only to his mother.

On the other hand, many women start remembering the time that they were free and had no obligations with melancholy. The life of a free girl is totally different from the life of a mother and housewife...

Last, we have to mention the interference of the couple's relatives in their lives with the existence of a child, especially from grandfathers and grandmothers, who start helping them in their new role as parents, and at the same time, keep demanding their right to be near the child they adore.

A young couple had better be well prepared to face these problems before deciding to have a child, and especially, care about organizing their lives in a way that their relationship won't be threatened.

This period of time doesn't last too long, and usually they get adapted to the new situation, especially when the baby starts becoming a real human being and they can play with him.

However, they need their peaceful moments together, without the interference of anyone else, even of their own child. There are many points that have to be considered...

Organization and much preparation are indispensable if they want to avoid living separately in the beginning of their lives as new parents, and if they want to really become more united thanks to the existence of their child.

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Christina Sponias
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