Do you wish his eyes be glued on you?

Let me tell you a story. It's a true story.

Just recently, I got interested in a guy. I'm not supposed to share this with anyone, including you, lest my partner gets to know about it. :)

However, being an avid student of human nature and inter-personal relationships, I could not help wondering, what is it (about him, or me?) that has made me attracted to him?

But, don't be mistaken. Until today, we are just very good friends. I still have my partner with me, so I wouldn't want to do anything that will break my relationship with him.

We have a common interest though. This is why we click together and always enjoy each other's company, with no expectation from each other.

He had gone through several failed relationships, and we had a talk about this one day over coffee at a cafe. He was hurt that the relationships he had with his ex-girlfriends didn't work out the way he wanted them to. However, that didn't destroy him; instead, in his own words, such experiences make him even stronger.

I realized that I admired his courage and strength to be able to pick himself up even after a heart-breaking experience. In fact, I was inspired by him.

"We had conflicts and disagreements. It didn't work out, everyone of them (his girlfriends) initiated the break-up. I didn't put in the effort to pursue and thus eventually we broke up. I was devastated then. But I'm not going to allow myself to be enveloped in self-pity and sorrow. I put all my attention, energy and focus on my passion, that is, bodybuilding. I realized that, whatever effort, time, money, and energy I had put into bodybuilding, it has all paid off handsomely. I could see the results I want to see. With relationship, it is so different. You cannot control the outcome; you cannot control the other person."

He is so right. You cannot control another person or how he will think and behave. You only have control of your-self, this indirectly implies the power you have in your hands. You CHOOSE whether your circumstance controls you or destroy you; else choose a more positive way of reacting and responding to your circumstances.

I didn't tell him this secret which I have been holding in my heart, that I enjoyed his accompany and going out with him, even training together with him at the gym whenever I can find the time to do it.

I asked myself what had made him seem attractive. The answers I got shocked me further.

(1) He inspired me with his insights about life and relationships. In short, he had what I had been seeking and searching - the answers to some of the tough questions about life and relationship.

(2) I found myself wanting to go out with him often. He was confident about his passion and what he was doing. He was independent, had a character, and was not affected by what others think about whether whatever he is doing is right or wrong. In short, he was of a higher vibrational energy than I.

I realize, and I have been sharing this secret with many of my readers - By becoming interested in MYSELF, my partner becomes more interested in me! If you think it is a paradox. IT is! Many relationship challenges and difficulties often start when one of the couples shift his or her center onto another person, and many people do this unknowingly! Understand that your center is HERE, right now, within you; it is your safe haven and most truthworthy antenna. You do NOT have to search for it in another person!

This is one secret which has worked wonders for those who are willing to take the time to chew on it.

Inspire your partner today!

However, don't stop here. Dale Carnegie has taught that "If you want people to become interested in you, you have to become genuinely interested in others!"

Become genuinely interested in YOUR-SELF!

Become genuinely interested in others!

Combine this two, and you might find yourself being swamped with so much attention, you'll have to crack your head to find your own private time.

©2005

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