The most common reason relationships end is due to a lack of trust. A relationship built up of accumulated lies, no matter how small will eventually weigh the relationship down and into a black hole. Each new lie manifests the next one and sooner or later, you will be jumping to conclusions and filling your head with imagined scenarios of what they're trying to cover up for. This will be insulting to your partner and a lot of reasons why they would leave.

Regaining trust takes time and a lot of it comes down to your personal insecurities. If you are not 100% sure your ex is lying, why do you consider the worst case scenario first? The more you focus attention on something you 'fear', the more real it will become. Our imaginations can be powerful and the images we choose to see very vivid and real. If you know you have the power to change what you think, choose to consider other alternatives and weight them up equally.

If your ex has lied in the past but only in the past, you need to be careful you don't falsely accuse them based on that incentive alone. Evaluate your present knowledge of the situation and once again weigh up the different possibilities. If you give your partner the benefit of the doubt, this is a better way to reinforce keeping honest than if you always accuse and assume the worst.

On the other hand if you did a deed that disrupted your partner's trust in you, you need to do something important and that is to be completely 100% honest with yourself first. The reasons for lying can range from the very tiny white lie to something large like cheating. Each situation will be different and weighed upon differently in your partner's eyes, so gauge how large of a damage has been dealt. The size of the damage will be related to how long it will take to regain trust back.

One thing that is in your favour is that whatever mistake you have made. A good apology can work almost like a miracle. An apology delivered correctly has the power to cut away years of damage and wipe the slate clean for your relationship thus far. This is powerful for you to know and something you can apply to your everyday relationships as well.

Plan your apology, understand why you are apologizing and talk of feelings instead of blame or why it happened. Be sincere and come from a place of pure love and honesty.

Also check out: How To Give An Effective And Sincere Apology

Ashley Kay
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