One of the dilemmas of being single is having a great and unforgettable date. And one of the hindrances that prevent single people to have a great date is their shyness. The problem with being timid is it can be manifested into different ways depending on the person and can also be misinterpreted into a lot of ways. Some people can misinterpret shy people as arrogant, superior or intellectually challenged. Being shy is being introvert and people usually don't dig introvert personalities. Before we go to ways of overcoming shyness, it's just reasonable that we know why some people are shy and some are not.

Knowing the cause of being shy will help focus on how to overcome it properly. The common cause of being shy is poor self esteem. Poor self esteem can be rooted from childhood days or the developmental stage. Unfortunately some are brought to put more value on superficiality like looks or money or anything tangible that the person posses. If you are one of those who are not gifted with a symmetrical face, reprogram your mind and beliefs that what matters most is what is inside your mind and your heart. You have to internalize that what is essential to a person is its substance and the genuineness of the person's souls.

People who depends their "confidence" on good looks will not last very long. This does not mean that you should neglect your appearance all together. Keeping fit and presentable can help you overcome shyness but don't base your personality on your physical aspect. If you base it all your self esteem on looks you will be limited with a few kinds of people and usually its with people are not very pleasing and most of the time if your date likes you for your looks alone he or she usually stops after sleeping with you. Going back to shyness, in overcoming shyness you have to work on your brain power.

I don't mean that you turn yourself into a geek but letting your date see that you are more than just pretty face is a total turn on. In overcoming shyness work on your character, your character should be yours and not somebody else's. In overcoming shyness, be yourself and love it. You should learn to harness liking what you have. Remember that yourself is all you've got if you cannot learn to like it then nobody will. In other words, you should learn to be your own best friend. This is one of the most important factors if you want to overcome shyness, if you are comfortable with yourself, interacting comfortably to your date or to other people can be a walk in the park.

Nurture your self confidence from within and being shy will be out of your vocabulary. Another advice of overcoming shyness is to do away with comparison. There is this one line from a very beautiful poem Desiderata "Never compare yourself to others, for always there will be better and lesser person than yourself." So if you are in a situation that you get intimidated by your date because you think he or she is better that you, think again. Remember that when people are in a date, they always try to put their best foot forward, so don't be shy, don't be intimidated.

Work on your personality and your self confidence and you can kiss your shyness goodbye.

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Ruth Purple
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